This week’s post is a bit left-field to my usual weekly posts on writing.
It’s in honour of my precious friend and mentor Angela Raspass.
In our weekly call on Monday she helped me address my impatience and frustration that our farm at Red Hill is disorderly at the moment and inconducive to working and writing effectively. I’d been stuck in a mindset that I just had to accept it and it was out of my control.
Angela helped me see how working with the principles (self-knowledge, flexible thinking, emotional intelligence, intentional action and vitality cultivation) and tools of self-leadership could address the situation, which was taking place in my head.
It’s true that I do need to learn to accept that life on a farm is going to be disorderly—as nature will prove to us time and again. But it will also be sublime and surprising. The farm will always be a work-in-progress. At last count we have 33 projects on the list to bring to life! How could it ever be orderly? And why would I want it that way anyway?
It’s also untrue. I do not have to accept that it is all out of my control (that’s mere helplessness). I can take self-responsibility, not depend on my partner to fulfil my need for order, and take action where it matters most to me. I can at least ensure some places at the farm are orderly—our bedroom (always make the bed), the kitchen (always do the dishes) and the writers’ room (my office and our current project which is almost finished).
And then I must learn to make peace with it.
‘You have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable,’ Angela joked throwing one of my oft-used lines right back at me. We teach what we most need to learn, right?
So, what are the things we can control? And what are the things we can’t? Perhaps the act of being able to distinguish between the two, is the secret to freedom? Surrendering to what is, might just be the greatest self-leadership tool of all?
But don’t take my word for it. Let’s all check in with Angela. She’s running a series of free Self-leadership Seminars for women commencing on Tuesday 22 August, 11am-12pm. I’d love you to join us. In these sessions you’ll learn what self-leadership is, assess your own levels of self-leadership and discover new ways to become better at it.
Angela is the real deal. She’s engaging and fun and has been practicing and coaching self-leadership principles with women for over 10 years.
Register here: Self-Leadership Sessions
Personally, I’m attending these sessions to explore how to improve my self-leadership skills not only in life, but also on my current writing projects. What about you? Where could you use your new and improved self-leadership skills right now?
With love
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Join the next Brave Women Writers’ Circle
Commencing Friday 17 November
Are you a woman who yearns to share your story with the world? Do you often find yourself suppressing your inner voice and waiting for that perfect day to start writing? Or perhaps you’ve begun writing and are feeling stuck? If so, the Brave Women Writers’ Circle is the right place for you.
As an experienced author, writer and educator, the Brave Women Writers’ Circle will be led and facilitated by Carolyn Tate. With only 12 places available, the 12-week program is designed to guide you in bringing your writing project to life while connecting you to a courageous community of other women writers.
